Love is a very complex word having different meanings and expressions for different people. This month I'm exploring some of the many aspects of love. There are no classes offered in the educational system which insures us a life of love when followed correctly. We can read books on love and its effects on other people, we can witness love in the lives of others, but that does not assure us of finding love in our own lives.
Our parents are the first to demonstrate to us the meaning of love; from there, life and a long list of people and events educate us to love's meaning.
If those first demonstrations of love in our lives are not adequate, it can hinder or postpone our ability to have loving relationships. But ultimately we ourselves are responsible for the choices we make. Love is something most people want but don't really give much thought to. There are so many issues involved, which men and women don't even consider when it comes to love.
I have always felt that questions help us to understand thoughts held within us. So, today, I would like to present to you a list of questions to help you delve into your own mind, helping you to understand your own views on love. Perhaps you might like to compare your answers to the answers of the one you love.
So, what is love; how is it acquired and sustained through the years? Is it a choice, thought, passion, a feeling or decision? What part does attraction and lust have in this phenomenon?
How often is love possible in one's lifetime? If more than once is possible, then are the depths of love the same? Is it possible to love more than one person at the same time?
What is the difference between love of persons and things?
What is love at first sight - puppy love - mature love - spiritual love?
Is love found, earned or chosen? Is it discarded, lost or does it die?
Is it possible for one person to love or does it require two?
If one journeys through life alone has one never loved?
What is the difference between like and love?
Which is more important in a relationship?
Which is most important: To obtain love or to give love?
Is love always unconditional; should it be?
What is the difference between the love given to a child, parent, sibling, friend, lover, mate or spouse
What morals do you apply in your love relationships?
What are the consequences of unreturned love, and can love be love, without being returned?
Are there conditions to love? If so - what? If not – why not?
What is the difference between loves of the same sex, and love between opposite sexes?
Are there degrees of love? Are there differences in the degrees of love that males or females are able to give or receive?
Is it possible to travel through this life without having been loved or to love?
Is it possible to have been loved and not felt loved? Whose fault would that be, if anyone's?
What are the consequences of not loving or not having been loved?
If one is loved and has never felt loved, has one ever really been loved at all?
Is it possible for two people to TRULY have been in love, and then find that one or the other or both are no longer in love? If so - how does that happen?
And how long should you wait until you love again?
Why are some persons always attracted to the wrong people when it comes to loving relationships?
And what do you consider to be abuse in a love relationship?
How is itpossible to truly love someone and that person fail to love you?
What constitutes love? Where does it begin and end – the flesh, head, heart or soul? At what age is love possible to begin?
What percentage do you feel you should have to give when it comes to give and take in a love relationship?
Is the old saying really true, that it is better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all?
Does religious faith play a part in your choices of love?
Why is there the need to be loved, to give love?
Can love lay dormant or must it grow or die? And if it dies, where does it go? Can you ever not love, once you have loved? Does love have to manifest itself to a recipient to be love?
Is it possible to hide love, and would you - why or why not?
Can you love someone without ever having seen him or her, or interacted with that person?
How do you know when you're in love? How do you feel when you're in love?
Where do those feelings come from? Can those feelings change or be changed?
Does a person love with their head, their heart or their soul? Can they love with all three? What are the differences?
Should you always marry the person you love? Why or why not? For how long should you love someone before you love him or her enough to marry that person?
These are only a few questions that might help you to understand a bit more about your feelings, thoughts and ideas on love. Yes, love is a complex word, with many meanings. I would recommend giving it much thought, before you accept it, or give it away, or engage in a permanent relationship of love with anyone.
People often go blindly into love without asking themselves many questions related to what they really believe about the subject. Men and women have ecstatic physical feelings of arousal when they are near someone, and misinterpret that feeling for love.
Need is sometimes mistaken for love. But, giving is more related to the true meaning of love, than taking. Flowery words that promise the moon and the stars and all that go with it, is not love. Love is an active application of support and care, not a showy promise of material things.
Love that has seen no hardship, knows not if it can survive, for it has not been tested and gone through the fire. Give me a love that's been tried and tested, that has seen hardships and strife during its life. Give me a love that is not perfect, that has seen the valleys life can dish out. Give me a love that has been though disappointments and has known imperfections. Give me a love that is old and renewed everyday, not a new love that is afraid to move forward with age. Give me a love that has been held in the fire, for that is a love that has been polished and refined like silver, and will last through the years.
Give me not a love that has been blindly fallen into, for that love lacks roots that are sturdy and strong and often cannot withstand the howling winds of adversity.
Things that cause loves to grow often are not pleasant, much like the trials of this life that strengthen. But, like knots that give strength to a rope that's been broken, forgiven mistakes in a love can be the ties that bind.
Love grows as it is nourished - feed it well.
Betty King had been living with Multiple Sclerosis for many years She went to be with the Lord died at the age of 69, at her home in Mt. Vernon, Illinois, USA, On Saturday, Jan. 22, 2011. Betty was an author, newspaper columnist, devotional writer, freelance writer and speaker. She has publishing credits in newspapers, magazines, poetry books and anthologies. She is author of four published books, It Takes Two Mountains to Make a Valley, But-It Was in the Valleys I Grew, The Fragrance of Life and Safe and Secure in the Palm of His Hand. She was also a member of Central Christian Church and the Roaring 20’s Club in Mt. Vernon, USA.